Monday, November 11, 2013

Zombie 3

Zombie 3 (Zombie Flesh Eaters 2) Directed By Bruno Mattei/C. Fragasso/Lucio Fulci (1988).
I've never wanted to watch any of the Zombie sequels because I put the 1979 Chunkblower gut munching classic on such a high pedestal. I decided however to break the barrier and suffer through the rest of the sequels. I have to watch everything in the Deep Red catalog at least once. Chas mentioned that Zombie 4 After Death is a personal favorite, so be on the look out for that review coming soon.
My pores ooze stinky Nilbog milk

   The stink of Claudio Fraggaso is smudged all over this one already so, I wasn't looking forward to it! It's been awhile since I've taken the Marinara plunge after wallowing in so much Chow Mien for the past few reviews. But I think its time to slather myself in Ricotta cheese and endure Zombie Flesh Eaters 2 (or Zombie 3). Why it took them this long capitalize on the super popular original film is beyond me (Heh, get it "The Beyond")? 
   They never bother to tie anything that happened in the original to this other one, so it's not really a sequel at all (just like Zombi 2 was never a sequel to Dawn Of The Dead)! You'd be hard pressed to find a linear series of Italian exploitation sequels anyway.
   From the military contamination scare to the idiotic scientists, this sequel is screaming "Bruno Mattei Was Here" (as if he carved his name on the walls)! Skunkape swears that Fulci was in the director's chair up until he had a stroke, but I'm still not so sure.
   At a scummy hotel, a plague is spreading around and causing people's appendages to drop off in a puddle of green and blood red slime! The Hazmat dudes run around the halls and find neon green zombies (that are pretty docile for the "living" dead)! 
Yarrghhh, straight out of the fridge onto your plate!

   Zombie 3 has the most inconsistent zombies, some fly, run, swim or slowly tread. You can tell all they were concerned with was that some other film was being copied in one form or another.
   They even copy Return Of The Living Dead as the cremated bodies become acid rain and threaten to restart the zombie plague all over again. 
   Three goofy soldiers with a ghetto blasters stalk an RV full of loose women. There's a disc jocky named Blue Heart who sends out ecological warnings and seems to know what's going to happen next.  
So until next time, keep your head between your knees and kiss your ass goodbye
   All of a sudden a birdemic breaks out over the rocking sounds of the Clue In The Crew (who totally suck)! The rest of the score is by Stefano Mainetti is pretty decent in a vaguely familiar Goblin/Frizzi style.
   The birds later show up in the 5th Zombie sequel Killing Birds. The fast moving undead start to show up and one even looks like distant relative of Tar man. The deserted hotel's production design looks like they just tossed ferns and hung spider plants in each corner of the room. The military decides to seal off the infected island (like they should have done on Matool). Fragasso, who wrote the script is recycling most elements from ROTLD and adding a dash of his other thieveries
   More zombies start trickling in and push one annoying girl off a balcony into some water that dissolves her legs lickity split! Crappy looking zombies that look like the ones from Zombie Lake start slopping around in the water. Blue Heart got a hold of what sounds like an economy pack of George Romero media "zombie apocalypse" scripts and reads them over the air. The best line is "If you see guys in white over-alls, run to them they will help". By that he means they will kill you!
stay still while we help you!
    My favorite zombie in the whole film is a flying severed head that pops out of the fridge and bites a couple looking for snacks. One zombie immediately learns how to talk and looks like a middle aged Filipino women in a dress shirt. 
I'm all dressed up for my interview
   The few survivors actually have flame throwers and machine guns, which I think they kept secret from the other in their group that were eaten (why I have no idea, maybe out of spite)! 
   One guy who looks like an extra from Troll 2 with a load in his pants is obliterated by the hazmats trying to catch a chicken to eat for lunch. The military hypocrisy is very typical and I recognized a voice actor from Cannibal Holocaust: The Begining! 
   The ending is really great and makes me wonder, what if Bub (from Day Of The Dead) had become an oldies DJ? As inept and retarded as this sequel is, its a lot of fun, but completely unoriginal. Pure exploitation with hokey make-up effects and generic military characters. I liked it enough that I'm going to check out the other sequels and see which one gives me a migraine, I hope you enjoy all the suffering that it may cause my brain! 
Wake me up before you Go Go...


  1. It's a toss up for me between 3 and 4 as to which is better. HOWEVER, #5 (Killing Birds) is by far the worst.

    There is something special about 3 though, knowing that Fulci, Mattei and Fragassi all had at least a little something to with it.

  2. It took me 28 years to see this sequel, I've been avoiding it for that long!

  3. A "beyond" joke and a "wham" joke in one review! Comedy Gold!

  4. I'm trying to set the bar as low as it can go!


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