Saturday, November 16, 2013

Touch And Go

Touch And Go (Point Of Return, Yi chu ji fa) Directed By Ringo Lam Starring Sammo Hung (1991).

The last Sammo Hung picture we reviewed was the notorious Panty Hose Hero, a vile homophobic oddly compelling intolerant classic. Now Sammo is back in this Ringo Lam flick, he plays Fat Goose, a man who bathes in front of his house with a garden hose like an animal. Goose involuntarily witnesses a back alley stabbing of a police officer who has secret photos of hookers doing the deed with high society people. 
   Goose has an over protective mom (or Mother Goose)! that judges his girlfriend by saying don't get her pregnant because any children you have will grow hideous smokers teeth (whatever that means)! She has reason to worry because he pays hookers to act like his "girlfriend". There's also a Hi-C fruit punch vending machine at the restaurant cafeteria where Goose works that I was intrigued by. 
   A cop named Pittbull (Ming Wan Yeung, who was also in Ebola Syndrome) takes him in for questioning and ends up in a high sped car chase with a gun toting Triad.
Rest In Piece Mr. Stuntman

   In Hong Kong, CID procedure according to the Golden Harvest mythos goes like this, you can pin a criminal to a car with a blasted gas tank that will explode in three seconds, then aim a gun at the criminal's temple with out a jury or consequences! I say let the police corruption run rampant! It turns out the guy who stabbed the CID agent in the beginning is named God Of Hell Fire (The Crazy World Of Arthur Brown's lawyers should take offense)! 
But a pile of shit has a 1000 eyes
   Fatty is very paranoid about talking to the cops (and with good reason), once they find out he's a witness, they throw molotov cocktails at his house and burn it down! 
   There's odd toilet humor and jokes that Jing Wong would appreciate, like a goldfish bowl being used to put out a fire and Fat Goose can tell if someone had eaten chicken after going to the bathroom. The fact that he has to always find a fake girlfriend to impress his mother is unfunny too. Fatty doesn't want to fight with the God Of Hell (played by Kwong Leung Wong) and tries a peace offering, but he won't let up. The God lives up to his name and his gang throw fireballs at Pitt the cop while in a backwards car chase.
Sammo Hung as the Chinese Star Wars kid
   He's a sick bastard and chains Pitt and Fatty up to two cars while shocking them with the battery. GOHF's girlfriend agrees to help them out and was a member of the prostitution ring seen in the beginning. The photos start to unravel Pitt's sense of honor and trust,because one of his superiors is caught in the pictures and he confronts him. 
   The creepiest part of the movie was the moment, Hellfire slices up a girl fatty likes with a Rambo knife and forces him to smile about it! 

   It all ends with a burning bus crash and a final fight in the rain as Fatty psychologically tortures his nemesis. Deep Red was the first place I had ever heard of Ringo Lam and this one is pretty satisfying in the action department. Sammo is always likeable and he's got a killer fighting style. Lam made Undeclared War right before this film,which was his first foray into Western territory, it had Vernon Wells (The Road Warrior) and Olivia Hussey (Black Christmas). That film was panned (I still want to see it), maybe after that disaster he needed a good luck charm with Mr. Bowlhair cut, split lip, taught Jackie Chan everything he knows.

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