Thursday, July 18, 2013

Last House On The Left 2

Last House On The Left 2 (Late Night Trains, New House On The Left, Night Train Murders) Directed By Aldo Lado. Starring Irene Miracle (1975).
   This film came out only three years after it's originator Last House On The Left, It shamelessly steals from the Wes Craven flick (which was a loosely based remake of The Virgin Spring). It starts off with two street punks assaulting Santa Claus during Christmas as the warbling goat voiced song "All You Need Is A Flower" by former Aphrodite's Child singer Demis Roussos plays over the credits. Aphrodite's Child were a great 60's psychedelic band that had soundtrack maven Vangelis in its roster. 
Don't be jealous of my sweet hat
   Curly(Gianfranco De grassi) and Blackie (Flavio Bucci) replace Weasel and Junior as they terrorize innocent shoppers. Director Aldo Lado like Jorge Grau's Let Sleeping Corpses Lie (which was the first to steal from NOTLD) capitalized on the Last House exploitation rip-a-thon that seemed to line the pockets of many Italian filmmakers for years to come (Ruggero Deodato at least had the sense to cast David Hess as his lead psycho in the fake Krug role). Hallmark, the company that distributed the original Last House also carried this one (Keep Repeating.. "It's Only A Ripoff").
  Two girls (one virginal and one promiscuous) are on their way home for Christmas aboard a train packed with smokers and wacky "Hard Days Night" style passengers.
   Irene Miracle (who I remember as the sexy girl with the wet t-shirt in the beginning of Dario Argento's Inferno) plays Margaret, the "Phyllis" copy. Laura D'Angelo is the fake "Mary". Flavia Bucci played the blind pianist in Suspiria whose seeing eye dog rips out his throat is Blackie. His partner is named Curly. Macha Meril is a veil wearing nympho, Blackie has sex with her in a bathroom and she joins their voyeuristic torture club. Almost of the these actors later went on to work with Dario Argento. Meril famously played the drooling psychic who is murdered right in the beginning of Deep Red. Curly is seen shooting up (like Junior Stillo, who mentions that he's sick from withdrawal). He incessantly plays the eerie Morricone harmonica theme and looks like a cross between Warwick Davis and Mick Jagger.
The word on the street is they're casting for Willow 2, here's my audition
  Instead of the "piss your pants" scene, all of the excruciating humiliation occurs in a train car bathed in blue light (as a creepy passengers peeps through the window in the background). There seems to be absolutely no security other than ticket takers. 
   The most revolting part happens when Lisa, is held down by both male and female characters and stabbed in the vagina with a switchblade! Macha tries to smooth things over by saying she once had a small incision on her hymen to terminate her virginity. Thanks for helping, but no thanks lady!There's no remorse at all in these characters as they dispose of Lisa's body. Irene Miracle tries to escape and runs around bottomless in sexy high boots, then jumps to her death!
Not Sadie, Weasel or Krug
   Once the passengers make their way to the "Last Stop On The Edge Of The Train Station", they are met by the vengeful father of one of the girls. They have dinner with the parents of the girl they murdered (sound familiar)? The Doctor later uses the metal stand attached to the plasma bag as a skewer instead of Gaylord Fields weapon of choice; the chainsaw. The father played by Enrico Maria Salerno also stabs Curly right through his dick! Unlike the chewjob giving mom that bit off Weasel's wiener, the mom in this stays out of it and lets the father handle the carnage. The most unforgivable sin the film commits however is letting the lady on the train get away.
You stabbed my favorite pair of testicles!
   Lado attempts to class up the joint by using a Morricone score and casting Macha Meril as a nameless nympho only referred to in the credits, as the lady on the train (she is most likely a left over combo of Sadie and Krug). Check out David Szulkin's excellent book on the making of Last House On The Left, which has an entire chapter on fake versions of the Craven/ Cunningham debut. As much of a blatant ripoff as this movie is, it's well crafted, stylized and a nice companion piece to the Wes Craven film. Both are great (one is untouchable)! I highly recommend both of them! The film was banned for awhile and on the Video Nasty list until Blue-Underground put out the DVD packed with extras.

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