Wednesday, November 18, 2015

Night of a 1000 Cats

Night of a 1000 Cats Directed By Rene Cardona Jr. (1972).

All I know about this Rene Cardona Jr. feline "terror-rama" is that supposedly a bunch of cats were really hurt or killed during the production, which is very sad, someone should've reported him to ASPCA. This is the son of the guy who directed Night of the Bloody Apes and the Mexican Santa Claus and he seems to have a deranged fixation on authentic animal cruelty, there's something mentally wrong with this dude! Cardona Jr. seems to always capitalize on real tragedy with gems like Guyana Cult of the Damned, Survive or squeeze out bad rip offs like Tintorera: The Killer Shark. He's got a couple in the Deep Red catalog and is basically in league with most exploitation directors who've committed crimes without unions, or hurt animals for no reason, just another creep I guess.

Anyway, Hugo Stiglitz is in this one as usual, looking more like a life sized 70's hobo doll than his regular Gene Wilder get up. At first I thought my ears were broken but then I listened again and noticed that the voice that dubbed him is set at the wrong pitch (in fact everyone's voice sounds like a slowed down record), it's hysterical, it reaches that Thurl Ravenscroft (aka Tony The Tiger) baritone! 
The original title was Bloodfeast, I wonder if in the 80's, certain Mexican convenient stores tried to pass this off as the H.G. Lewis classic.

The WOW Network proudly presents "Pussy Pit"

Hugo catches a cat who tries to grab his food off the table and hucks it over a giant chain-link fence into a pit of tons of other furry pals. I'm allergic to this movie already, but it's so silly that I can't turn it off. At one point he drowns a cat and it looks incredibly real, any sensitive viewers don't bother watching this, it's terrible and cruel. I thought in Cyclone (which the son of Cardona also directed had a real dog that gets eaten, but it turned out to be a cleverly disguised fake). What I don't understand is how he was able to get away with this shit, well at least he's not as enamored as the most famous animal torture king Ruggero Deodato!

Hugo (who's character name is Hugo!) shocks his girlfriend by showing her his collection of severed heads in jars. Later on, he kills her and it's insinuated that the wet pile of red slithery meat is her all ground up bite sized. He decides that he should grind people up and feed them to the cats but he could easily just go to the store and buy regular food, man rich people are so cheap!

I gotta get this Gordita meat over to Chuys Mexican restaurant 

Oh yeah I forgot to mention Gorgo (or Borgo, the sound was broken through the entire production), his bald server who does his evil bidding and cooks great! What else could you want in a henchman

The soundtrack is funny it's all jungle drums and non impressive surfy guitar. Hugo flies around in his chopper thinking about his pit of cats. I think they should've played "Cat Scratch Fever," now there's a missed opportunity. He seems like a rich philanthropist but mainly flies around and abducts women. All the girls he picks up are sexy, obviously they are shallow and only care about his riches, never mind that he tortures poor cats. They spend 5 minutes having him do wacky hand signals to a girl in a leotard, which I guess is supposed to be funny. I like how in any language this movie would be stupid and not make any sense.

Looks like I got cat meat in the old pushbroom

Nothing about either title makes any sense because there's no blood and the cats are not really a threat, I would've suggested they call this Hugo-copter instead. It gets to the point where the slow ass voices seem like a prank and I never got used to them, they never failed to give me the giggles though. I'm not sure why this is in the Deep Red catalog, maybe because it's so low grade and dumb it must be seen to confirm how bat shit crazy it is like another "Unwatchable" The Black Devil Doll From Hell


It's your move Jason Bateman

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