Thursday, April 9, 2015

VASE DE NOCES The Pig Fucking Movie

-Reviewed by Skunkape-
Directed by Thierry Zeno-1974
Ever since I saw the title "Pig Fucking Movie" in Todd Tjersland's Threat Theater International catalog, it was always on my must see list. (I’m pretty sure Deep Red didn’t ever carry this one.) I have no interest in bestiality, well some obviously, but as young VHS collector and a John Waters fan it was all about the shock. Having a video called Pig Fucking Movie on my elite rack of cult films seemed like a necessity. Twenty bucks was pretty steep at the time, especially when I was buying up more high profile titles like Make Them Die Slowly, Meet the Feebles, and an un-subbed Porno Holocaust. The title was bookmarked, however, no purchase was made. I did come close when placing an order by phone at T.T.I. but the lovely gentleman warned me of the pain and boredom that would ensue upon watching. So, with the demise of tape trading and the rise of DVD I never quite forgot about the film but where would I ever find a copy? What distributor would even consider releasing this film under the title Pig Fucking Movie? I never saw a trace of this movie at any video store or convention, the quest of obtaining this art house shock fest seemed hopeless. Seriously though, a title that starts with the two words PIG FUCKING can't exist, it has to be a nickname that it earned based on the content? Right?
HERE’S A HYPOTHETICAL CONVERSATION
Harry: I went to the pictures last night!
Tina Marie:  Whatcha See?
Harry: You know, that “Pig Fucking Movie.”


That pretty much sums it up!

  
The Belgium film's true title is Vace De Noces which translates to Wedding Trough. It’s also known as A Boy and his Pig or even One Man and his Pig. The one man in the film is Dominique Garny as the Pig Porkin' Farmer. Whatever title you decide to use, you'll never forget it!
God only knows what Charlotte would write in her web, if she was a resident on this F'd up farm!



Filmed in Black and White and accompanied by an amazing score, the film starts with a lonely farm boy trying to screw a baby doll's head onto a bird. You wanted art house, you got it! After several failed attempts, he sets the bird free from an upstairs window in the farmhouse. You see, this is symbolic of, well, uh, how the hell am I supposed to know! Need I remind you that this is the Pig Fucking Movie! After that, we see and hear the pig eating while lover boy fondles the pig’s nips in a nice close up shot.
Shortly after, the pig does her job plowing the garden while we watch some shots of the other farm animals.  After about a minute of some normal farm life, things start to get twisted again. The farmer wears a blind fold trying to find the pig, as if they are playing some sort of weird catch me if you can game. When Ms. Piggy is caught, it becomes time for the farmer to drop his drawers but before we see any real action, the director cuts away. Oh Mr. Zeno you’re such a tease. Dinner Time! The farmer gets hungry, says his prayers, and chows down. It’s no surprise that he eats just like a pig, slurping and stuffing his mouth.


I don't think that's going to stay on genius!
Cold Day!

"Marco!" "Porko!"




The film suddenly steers away from it’s unique high brow artsy fartsy approach regarding the taboo subject matter and gets all Troma. The farmer sits on his outside bucket toilet and takes a shit. We hear the pushing, straining, heavy breathing, and of course the extreme flatulence. A cut away of the pig pissing and dropping a deuce is also shown. I did laugh out loud because after one extremely noisy fart, there was a reaction shot of two ducks who looked rather offended.
"We should have a threeway with Arnold Ziffel!"

It’s only been twenty minutes but I feel like of been watching this for an hour. Witnessing the strange relationship of this man, this pig and all the other strange happenings get very tedious. After all, there's not a single word of dialogue, just snorting.  The snorting gets louder and louder when the pig gets chased and groped by the naked farmer, it’s all to real and very uncomfortable. With the foreplay over, it’s finally time to go hog wild and the pig gets fucked full force in a simulated sex scene.(thank God) Sadly the sex scene isn’t even the most shocking part of the film, the pig gives birth on camera! Is the farmer the Dad? I sure as hell didn’t see any other pigs around.
"Lets hit the hay!"

"You put the oink in B-oink"

 So now with three brand new little piglets to take care of, you would think they would all be one big happy family and live happily ever after. That is soooo not the case! The little oinkers interfere with Old McDoofus's sex life, so what does he do? He hangs the piglets! I don’t know if the pigs in the film were killed but there are definitely three real dead pigs hanging from nooses. Mom pig goes mad and dies when she sees this. A real dead pig is tied to ladder is dragged to a shallow grave and the farmer out of respect, sadness, remorse (you pick one) climbs in the dirt pit and buries himself up to his head. He climbs out only when it’s time for him to take a dump.
"Your Mom's a P.I.L.F."

"Oh no he didn't!"

4 legs good! 2 legs bad!

Pig Pen's Dad

Now, all alone, he takes down the hanging piglets and puts them in jars. He also removes poop from the toilet and puts that in jars, For the next 15 minutes we have to sit and watch this guy eat poop! I "shit" you not! After he runs out of feces, he barfs, climbs a ladder and hangs himself. Good riddance and fuck you movie.


EWWWW-EW

Pukin' Up Poop!

So, am I glad that I saw this? Yes! It feels like a weight has been lifted off my chest for getting through the whole thing. I really hated seeing the dead pigs though. Nobody likes dead animals in films, especially terrible films. Chickens died in John Waters’ films, Italian Cannibal films spare nothing that moves but those films are so entertaining that I can’t help but let it slide, no matter how depraved. I know it's shitty. 
This film clearly embraces the idea of man and animal and really showcases it in a serious manor. I don’t recommend this to anyone. But if you are looking for a good movie about animal humping I suggest Revenge of Billy the Kid and Dog Lay Afternoon.

This has been one of the hardest thing I’ve ever had to watch, much like Victor Salva’s Powder. So if you’re like me and you just have to see everything for yourself, go ahead watch it, I won’t judge. (You sick mother fucking freak!)

In May 2009 Camera Obscura released this film!

There's even a bonus disc that could actually even answer all the questions- about the symbolism, the dead pigs, and why this film was ever made! If anyone has it let me know!

• DISC TWO:
• OF PIGS AND MEN documentary (16:9; 72:30; in French with optional English and German subtitles)
• Intro by director Thierry Zéno and co-writer Dominque Garny (4:3; 0:38; in French with English and German subtitles)
• Outro by director Thierry Zéno and co-writer Dominque Garny (4:3; 0:13; in French with optional
• English and German subtitles)

 HATED IT
It still gets a
6/10 On the CULT-0-METER
For it's overall sickness, quite frankly, it's unforgetable and will have you thinking about it for weeks to cum!

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If anyone has the bonus features for this film with english subs and wants to share please contact me!
Thank You!

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