Sunday, February 10, 2013

Die Screaming Marianne

Die Screaming Marianne Directed By Peter Walker. 1971
          Susan George is one actress that has been on both sides of the film spectrum (classy and guttertripe), she's worked with Franco Nero in Enter The Ninja, Klaus Kinski in Venom (with a face biting snake) and most famously in Straw Dogs. Here she plays a hitch hiking go-go dancer in Die Screaming Marianne, so its a safe bet that who ever Marianne is, she ends up six feet beneath the cold ground, dying a horrible death! 
          As far as go-go dancers go, Marianne( George) wears enough gold around her cooter to choke out Mr. T! I mean her crotch just looks rich, so hang onto those dollars! 
dedicated follower of fashion

          Sebastian, a poncy hairdresser who has very forward plans on marrying her seems to have devious motives on his mind. He and his pal have girly mod hair and wear over sized frilly scarves. Susan George has that kind of white lipstick, Brady Bunch look in this film, she has no say in this awkward forced marriage. She then takes the ring and splits (all part of some elaborate scam, apparently). Some shady characters at a party show up and plan on killing Marianne (finally)! The Judge, an old geezer with sharpie eyebrows and incest on his mind gives this flick that dose of creepiness, its been lacking but then it goes back to being stale.
         Sebastian's pal Eli accidentally stabs a fat guy in the hallway. Marianne gets locked in a sauna and the Judge burns up in a car wreck. She never screams or dies, so the title is false advertising! The pacing is very thin and doesn't build up to much tension or excitement, you could take a nap and not miss much. Everyone is conniving and money hungry to get the Judge's money. It's a slow moving mildly entertaining bore. 
          I remember seeing the very misleading videobox (apparently this is a video nasty based solely on the cover box) for this film that had a blonde with a mouth like a trout, her neck was slit open and blood was trailing down. I would have been seriously pissed if I rented this and waited around for this awesome spectacle to show up. The film is very cheesy, but entertaining in a kind of swinging London way. If you come expecting a bloodbath, don't bother, this film is not for you. I wanted to give Peter Walker a chance on this blog, but gore fans stay away and stay tuned for more ghoulish goodies next time.    

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