Mad Foxes (Los Violadores) Directed Paul Grau By Starring Jose Gras (1981)
Mad Foxes is an almost totally unknown exploitation classic that never registers on cult movie fans top ten lists, but it mixes brutal castration, gratuitous sex, Nazi hijinx and so much flaccid peen that it's almost a gay porn with car crashes and Nazi biker mayhem!
COBRA!
Why are all these GI Joe Drednoughts like Nazi villains chasing after Hal Walters (played by 70's Hulk Mego lookalike Jose Gras) anyway? Could it be he's a super ladies man who drives a sweet white hot Chevy Stingray, that never receives any damage, not even so much as a scratch? Yes I believe so!
Don't bother me I'm pooping
Does he ever relinquish the wheel over to these bumbling Dumkuff numb skulls who smash and gut everyone around him including all of his girlfriends, maid, and parents? Fuck that shit! That car is just too precious for him to give up without creating every moment of devastation that up heaves his life into oblivion.
Do your worst, I'll never talk
Mad Foxes breaks out in full blast with the surprisingly catchy Krokus tune called 'Easy Rocker' and never really slows down. Right from the start Hal brings his sex kitten jail bait girlfriend to a disco and that car being the punk magnet that it is, attracts the clownish Nazi psychos with its powers.
Since Hal won't give it up he gets pummeled and his super cute babe gets viciously fingered, which pops her hymen and one of the punks even flicks the blood on her nose!! This kind of mean spirited haranguing didn't even happen in the steamy jungles in Hell Of The Living Dead and that was pretty sleazy!
I want my MTV!
There are so many vile images in Mad Foxes that the most shocking ones over shadow the boredom that happens midway towards the end. The dubbing is excessively clunky and comes off like a badly dubbed Godfrey Ho feature but with Swedes and Germans. Hal does pay back the Nazi degenerates in the most appallingly justified manor (in theory anyway), he and some other lunkheads, who get taken down later on, precede to pull out the prick of one Nazi perpetrator who looks like a hybrid of Rob Halford/ Freddy Mercury, slice it off and then stuff it down his gullet!!!!! I shit you not!
If you haven't already stopped reading and searched the Internet or rented it on DVD, there is something wrong with your morbid curiosity brain switch!!!! Hal moves on to the next chick faster than anyone can bury the bodies because he is such a debonaire ladies man! And its hard to keep track of how many women are eager to sleep with him, at one disgusting low point he sex with a girl in pee colored bath water!
Paris Himmler
It's hard not to give everything away in this film because its filled with insanely head scratching images that you'll have to later scrub from your brain with steel wool once you absorb them into your subconscious. There is an excessive amount of German dongs and furious humping (the gang sort of reminds me of the rarely seen other group of hooligans in Clockwork Orange). I wonder if the producers wanted to out gore Clockwork and felt that there should be a more vicious gang inspired by that little moment in the Anthony Burgess/ Kubrick film.The German babes in this film are all really attractive and most of them get naked, so there's a little bit of something thrown in for all sexual persuasions. The climax (pun intended) will poke your eyes out as a grenade is thrown into a toilet and a flaccid penis is front and center attached to a dude that looks like Mike Tyson's Punch Out villain Von Kaiser!!! YUCK!
I also have to commend the sadly now defunct Xploited Cinema, and Shocking Videos for turning me and Skunkape onto this flick, thanks alot! Highly Recommended 10/10 for Shock Value alone! AVAILABLE to buy at J4HI.COM
Directed By Jim Monaco trailers from the Mad Ron Archives (1987)
I
remember being ravenously excited tofind a copy of this bootleg after reading The Dr. Cyclops
review in Fangoria describing it as the ultimate party tape! None of the
videostores I knew of in Florida had a copy, so I went to the black market I’m
not ashamed! When I got the tape from Chas like many ghoulish films I’d seen
before, I had that familiar mixed feeling of foreboding dread and excitement as I popped in the tape. The creepy Lansdowne Pennsylvania theater showed up as I
watched a goofy devil in a Halloween mask introduce me to the comedy stylings
of Nick Pawlow and his dummy Happy Goldsplatt in a theater of hungry zombies.
At first it didn’t register how awful the ventriloquism comedy was, then it got
to the point where he makes jokes about his rotting “weenie” and emits that
infectious cackle (whenever Skunkape and I greet each other on the phone we do
an impression of it). It’s bad comedy on a pre-Steve Brule or David Liebe Hart
level, or what fastfoward buttons were invented for.
I'll be here all week folks
I’ve watched this tape a
trillion times and have made it my life’s mission to watch every film at least
once (Mad Dr. Of Blood Island and Horror on Snape Island I have yet to
tackle)! Me and this tape have been through a lot over the years and there are
so many trailers of influential films that have effected me in a positive way.
It’s funny that when they put this out on DVD they didn’t bother to update the
scratchy, cigarette burnt filmstock at all even though most of these trailers
have been cleaned up since. I appreciate that Mad Ron still relishes the trashy integrity of the original trailers.
Bootleg of a Bootleg
There’s
so many incredibly rare trailers packed onto one tape at the time (1987), it
was pretty tough to find a trailer compilation this mindblowing! There are some
strange mixtures going on too, at first they hit you with the supremely
catholic double feature (stole that joke from Joe Bob Briggs): I Drink Your
Blood/ I Eat Your Skin, that Clay Pitts electronic wavering music turned my
stomach in a good way! Although the mixture from H.G. Lewis or NOTLD straight
into Mondo territory like Africa Blood and Guts (now in pristine condition c/o
Blue Underground under Africa Addio) is pretty damn alarming!
Robster Craw
Every scene spits in your eye
BFF's
This
is where I first learned about the famous Giggly Guy the cackling maniac who
lost his mind while watching I Dismember Mama/ Blood Spattered Bride one
fateful night!
Double
features and triple features (like The Living Dead Orgy) are paraded around
(many of these were in the Deep Red catalog) and it made me want to check them
all out! I would make video comps for people and always include the ultra
psychedelic Carnage (Bay Of Blood) trailer.
This is the first time I’d ever
heard of a GP rating and there were a few titles with that rating included (Black
Lace being one). The Mutations (or The Freak Maker) is an underrated classic
and there are so many films I would have never heard of, if it wasn’t for this
trailer tape! The comedy is appallingly bad and the sequel (yes there is a
sequel) to a trailer comp with a puppet monologue is called Celluloid Bloodbath
and it’s not as special. Mad Ron has that gleeful and grisly unawareness of its
own triumphs and flaws, Celluloid was made just to appeal to the new breed of
horror nerd (which I should include myself in), I appreciate it, but it just
didn’t have the same effect that the first comp had on me. There are so many
trailer compilations now (and Something Weird should also get credit for having
some brilliant ones in the past) that it’s hard to find a rare gem, one that not many horror
fans have already seen. Mad Ron however was the first that really affected me and
this collection of amazing trailers still holds up, the comedy not so much! The oddest part of the tape is the ending where a bootlegger's brain explodes as punishment for selling or dubbing the tape, by that account all the of our collective eyes should've melted a long time ago!
Starring: Pamela Ludwig, Dean Hamilton, Roy Thinnes, Courtney Gebhart
Directed by Bob Bralver (one of the stunt guys on "Road House" ha)
"Rush Week" is not mentioned that often when you think of either Cult Movies or 'B' Movies. It's usually panned, homegrown reviewers usually saying "There's a reason why you've never heard of it". Harsh! I think people might be expecting a little too much from this small, but fun film.
Lately, I've been a college sorority/fraternity kick when it comes to movies. Besides, "Rush Week", I've watched "The Initiation" (pretty good) and "Campus Corpse" (not so great) to name a couple. I started working part time at a company a couple of weeks ago that makes Greek letter shirts, so that's definitely fueling my preferences.
This magazine makes 2 appearances in this movie
In this case, "ΔΒΔ" or the Delta Beta Delta fraternity are the focus of "Rush Week". Toni is a Journalism student who's assigned by Cosmo, AKA Gregg Allman (!) to cover her college's Rush Week. With some mysterious happenings around campus, she has other ideas for her article. Cute red headed Pamela Ludwig plays Toni, but you probably remember her best from her first film, "Over The Edge". Then, she was hot stuff as Cory, the girl whose life ambition was to be a truck driver of all things. Jeff (Dean Hamilton, now a film company CEO) is her hunky, Patrick Swayze knock off (another "Road House reference! eww) boyfriend and head of "ΔΒΔ" with a secretive past.
There's some scenes that appear to copy ones from "Pretty In Pink" with using the late 1980s archaic version of Instant Messaging. Toni receives various messages on her black and green computer screen, but isn't entirely sure who is sending them. I wondered if the director had to meet a "Boob Quota" of some sort with this movie. Yes, there is such a thing. If you listen to the "Valley Girl" movie commentary, you'll hear director Martha Coolidge talk about how she had to include at least 3 boob shots in the film. How funny is that? I didn't count, but "Rush Week", *ahem* definitely "tops" that. There's also a subplot with a creepy photographer dude who has mostly naked girls pose with a dead body.
Like I said, I wouldn't expect too much from this movie, but it definitely has an unusual tone to it. I like it, but it's definitely not for everybody. I think it reads more like an exaggerated, boob-filled, blood-less thriller type of Lifetime Made For TV Movie. It has the whodunnit style plot line that keeps you guessing as to who's the real bad guy in the movie. Meanwhile, besides the 1991 garbage of the time (Fred Astraire III anyone?), the soundtrack includes, Devo, Dead Milkmen and even an appearance by The Dickies in a Halloween party scene. Most appropriate of all is their performance of "Booby Trap". ha!
"Rush Week" can be found on VHS (which is what I have) and a long out of print DVD. I didn't see an online/YouTube full movie link.
Salon Kitty Directed By Tinto "Brass Monkey" Brass Starring Ingrid Thulin. (1976)
Tinto "The Ass Man" Brass helmed this spectacle of Nazi kink cabaret
antics. The film opens with He/She musical numbers as both sides of her face sing different parts, what a fun time to be alive (only if you happen to be German), otherwise you aren't having such a swell time! Annie Ross, the woman who drives the Basket Case bus and got turned into a cyborg in Superman 3 is the singing voice that performs all the songs!
Naziploitation is such a misunderstood genre and can run on a scale of campy fun garbage (like Ilsa) to highly brow provocative garbage (like The Night Porter).
Fatman, but no Jake
Lady! Give Donald Duck back his outfit
They all tackle the debauchery and misery that went on from a Nazi perspective during the holocaust and most of them are hard to watch or enjoy, this is my least favorite sub genre. So then why am I watching this one, you may ask? I have no idea, but on some weird voyeuristic level I enjoy the total unabashed irrationalism and freedom these film carry, because they can pretty much show anything and I wonder what they will come up with!
4 out of 5 doctors choose bayer aspirin
Helmut Berger (Beast With A Gun, Faceless) plays a Nazi who hangs out
in a sauna (with a piano), where naked dudes jump rope as the camera roams
and hovers over their grotesque genitals. Helmut is no slouch when it comes to trashy movies, but what is an Ingmar Bergman eugenue like Ingrid Thulin doin in this? She must be comfortable around fake Nazis though (since she was also in Luchino Visconti's The Damned)!
this lady wondered on to the set of Contamination
A Nazi eugenics doctor insults a
black cadaver and then goes onto to praise an Aryan prostitute with a
stillborn half abortion coming out of her stomach (an obvious mannequin). They believe that
Jesus was not Jewish, but conceived by a Roman prostitute and a German
mercenary. If you are looking for a sadistic sleaze fest, look no
further, the first nine minutes are very disturbing! Real pigs are
slaughtered while cackling butchers prepare them for a feast. As gruesome as the live pig slaughter is, bacon fanatics like myself and Jim Gaffigan will recoil in horror, but probably won't go vegetarian, Pork is just that tasty!
this little piggy went to market
Naked Nazi soldiers are rounded up, male and female and ordered by
Helmut and others to get rid of their inhibitions and have a full blown
orgy, while a band plays. This must have happened a lot, since it was
also later depicted in Gestapo's Last Orgy! That film would steal a little from this one and The Night Porter to come up with its own death camp melodrama.
German version of The Bachelor
These sex scenes are more graphic
and very awkward as each of them are watched from a long hallway in
cramped cells. One demented scene shows a legless man entering a woman. Real dwarves and amputees are seen having sex (the IMDB message board is lighting up with oddball responses about this subject).
The soldiers lear in closely at the cells while the camera zooms in, I
love how these gruesome Nazi spectacles have talented production design
and crews, otherwise it would feel dirty. Not that there isn't a
cavalcade of perverted trash parading around in this vile naziploitation
vehicle, but thanks nonetheless Tinto!
One celebratory hussy who looks
like a tranny blow up doll sings the Liza Minelli caberet songs to
delight those who want a little pizazz with their Nazi freak show! That
sordid character is the title character Kitty Kellerman the famed madam of
the Third Reich!
Helmut hands his perfect stock of wenches over to Kitty and she
grooms ever speck of hair (whipping those beavers into tip top shape)!
Think of Salon Kitty as a less cannibalistic, but still fucked up Nazi romp with star power under its belt! The film is also a precursor to Caligula (that one had a major league budget) only replace the Nazi's with their distant relatives The Romans, (come to think of it Malcolm McDowell would have made a cool Nazi)!
It's less unpleasant then Gestapo but still pretty repulsive, so leave your barf bags in the closet and hang onto your opera glasses because there's some highbrow concepts floating around among the sludge! NO LINK RENT IT ON DVD C/O NETFLIX
Directed By Kent Bateman. Starring Bo Brundin. (1971)
You may be surprised to find that the sick bastard behind Headless Eyes is none other than the father of Jason and Justine Bateman! Is Headless Eyes ever mentioned at hollywood parties by Kent Bateman's more famous offspring? probably not.
A whiny burglar tries to get enough money for rent by attacking a sleeping woman (with an ugly wig). The woman retaliates by jabbing a spoon into his eyeball and his obnoxious sobbing is played on repeat over the credits (Yow, my eye)!
There's wobbly psychedelic music and constant shots of eyeballs (some drenched in blood). The whiny burglar graduates to maniac, he sort of looks like Phil Collins with an eyepatch. He collects eyeballs in his very small apartment, keeping some on ice. An elderly couple spot him and he follows them home and kills both of them with a hammer. Later on he stabs a friendly prostitute and takes over her slightly bigger apartment. He makes the headlines as The Eye Killer, but considers himself an artist. His over dramatic high pitched "theater" voice sometimes resembles the butler from Pink Flamingoes. His x-girlfriend who looks like Leonard Nimoy shows up and he rambles on about his failed art career and other gibberish.
Suu-susudio
The police are searching for him and he totally fools them by wearing sunglasses over his eyepatch, he is a textbook wanted poster ad looking character and still no one can find him. The psych music gets replaced by sneaky piano noises as he follows different people around.
His weapon is a spoon and at one point he shakily performs amateur surgery on an old lady. He babbles lots of gobbilty gook and it seems like he only preys on the very frail and timid, because he's such a spineless wimp! After the woman who plucked his eye out from the beginning coincidentally shows up again, he goes insane and prances around while voices monotonously waver back and forth. He drives out to the country side and exhumes a corpse so he can pull out her eyeball.
Check out my Senor Wences impression!
An art school girl follows him and tries to convince the killer that she should teach her the craft. Not how to pop out eyes with spoons, just how to sculpt. He starts to behave normally (maybe he just needs a friend)? The first time I heard of this film was through a 70's grindhouse company called Alpha Blue Archives that sold a handful of exploitation films, but mainly classic porn and they soon became an all porn company soon after. Why this film was rated X is confusing to me (possibly the version they sold had porn inserts edited in), I can't imagine where they would fit though. There are hardly any woman in the film or opportunities to show gratuitous nudity. The lead actor Bo Brundin went on to appear in one of the most sought after film rarities in existence, Jerry Lewis' notorious The Day The Clown Cried! Jerry has this film locked in a vault and vows to never show it ever again, it first played in 1972. Headless Eyes has plenty of interesting people attached like Jason and Justine Bateman's father and the Jerry Lewis connection, but ultimately fails as a slasher. Some critics mention that it is like The Driller Killer (a totally unfair comparison). If anything it's one of those low rent dimestore sleazy spectacle films you watch to poke fun of and it never rises above that bottom level of quality.
Alabama's Ghost Directed By Fredric Hobbs (1973). Starring Christopher Brooks.
As someone who lives in Oakland I think I know alittle more about what strange transformations occur when you cross over the bridge to San Francisco, this might be the reason why people are baffled by Alabama's Ghost and also the reason people bitch about crossing the bridge!
Christopher Brooks played Black Jesus in The Mack (which was filmed in Oakland), but when he ventured over the bridge (to Frisco) he turned into Alabama "King Of The Cosmos", all of this will be revealed or just blamed on heavy drug use in our feature tonight.
It starts off with a newscast from the archives of the mysterious Dr. Caligula, Hitler's expert in robot technology. You might think your ears are deceiving you as you listen about Carter the Great and a potent form of wacky tobac-ee (or an intense form of hasheesh or cartoon cackee)! Has this movie lost its mind already, you can never tell! but what can you expect from the Fredric Hobbs, the man who previously directed The Godmonster Of The Indian Flats?
Turk Murphy a dixieland jazz band in an old people dive bar called Earthquake Mcgoons (a real place in SF). It was closed when Turk died in 1987, they also named a street after him in the Tenderloin. Hopefully the band might clear up some things about this movie.They sing the title song as the credits roll by (has the film ended already? was it an acid flashback, what is going on)? Turk hops off stage and wakes up Alabama from his cat nap on the bar then he hops onto a forklift and rams it into a wall.
Feed Me Seymour!
He travels further into the pit of the club and hears a strange voice, it leads him toward a magic cabinet where he finds a pirate get up. The scary voice is only a record player.Whew, is everything gonna return to normal?
Alabama decides to cross a rickety bridge (it's suddenly daylight) and confront a creepy man dressed in a granny outfit (with vampire fangs) who is guarding Carter's magicians trunk. They both smoke the cartoon hash which inspires Alabama to proclaim himself "King Of The Cosmos".
Eugene Levy Untamed!
He uses Carter's spirit cabinet to resurrect the dead and surrounds himself with a hippy entourage. He gets increasingly more psychedelic (what's more 70's then an acid soaked magician like Doug Henning)? He drives around in a giant wagon with a gargoyle face and paper mache demons hanging off the side. His hippy group plays monotonous flutes before a Monterey Pop style crowd (magic is apparently really popular among the stoned)! they sort of sound like Sly & The Family Stone too.
Then it all goes wrong during the saw trick and Alabama mentions that he's afraid of Carter's ghostly fish eye placing a curse on him!
Even though he's spooked, this doesn't stop him from dabbling in the black arts! Then it gets worse as he is confronted by a wizard with an exposed bloody heart.
Alabama went into a transformation chamber and his hippy girl friend seems to be dousing him with acid behind his back. Carter's ghost shows up while he's trying to get laid and Alabama accuses him of racism then an earsplitting vampire scream happens as gnarly fangs jug out of his girlfriends mouth! Good thing she didn't give him head!
Ouch! Careful with those teeth!
Alice Cooper/ Alabama Sex Scandal
He runs screaming to his mother and soon a voodoo witchdoctor has entered the picture! As if this movie couldn't get anymore bat shit crazy! After the ritual which includes a lot of chanting, pounding and live snakes, he drives back in order to get primed for his television appearance. The vampire granny shows up again (without a costume) playing a wheelchair bound nosferatu named Jerry.
Alabama plans on making an elephant disappear, but Carter keeps showing up and bothering everyone! It turns out the beginning plot point wasn't thrown away (or maybe the scriptwriter just woke up) and Dr. Caligula is working with Jerry and his crew of vampires (some of them dress like witches). All this information is never tied together and everything is consistently bizarre, but never dull, it just doesn't really make sense. It all ends with a free Altamont style concert with a band called The Loading Zone?! and a clone of Alabama shooting vampires on motorcycles!! There's a little of everything in this strange movie to enjoy and its so warped and freaky that even if you can't believe how bad it is, its still a fun and a watchable psychedelic mind trip.
