Friday, December 19, 2014


 -Reviewed by Skunkape- 

 "Remember those two old bucks up above the falls, who were buttin' each other until they locked horns and they couldn't get loose...they died that way."

-the words of Jake "Tiger" Sharp to his old rival Tom

"Can't we all just get along?"

Directed by Lamberto Bava 1984
 Blastfighter aka "Mustache vs Beard!" At least that's what I call it! Well, not really. It stars Michael Sopkiw who is sporting the stash and the bearded one is none other than George Eastman. (Drop an Eastman movie title in the comment section where he doesn't have a beard! Can you?) The two previously worked together in Martino's 2019 After the Fall of New York and are back in this Lamberto Bava genre mash up. I think ultimately Blastfighter is an action movie at heart but throw in all the exploitation elements that Italian cinema is known for and the results are mind blowing.

"Say hello to my big friend."
Sopkiw is Jake "Tiger" Sharp, an ex cop who got in way over his head. The film begins with the heart pumping sounds of Fabio Frizzi's theme as Tiger is released from the slammer after serving eight years. While on the force he witnessed one of his fellow officers gunned down in cold blood by some goon. Unfortunately that goon was on a corrupt politician's pay roll and heads to Tiger's place to kill him. Tiger isn't at home but his wife is and the deviant brutally stabs her in the neck. With the politician's protection and no where to turn Tiger makes the decision to have his revenge and blows the criminal away, causing him to not pass GO, sending him directly to jail. Now out of prison, a close friend of his from the police force gives him the ultimate weapon so he can blow this politician straight to hell. Tiger seeks him out looks through the scope but can't do it. He decides revenge will not put him at ease and heads to his old home town out in the country to live out his life peacefully, but this is where the real problems begin.

"I killed your wife, nanny nanny, boo boo!"
 While he's driving we hear Tommie Baby's country cover of "Evening Star", originally composed by Barry, Robin, and Maurice Gibb! As soon as he gets into town and stops off for a few groceries the locals stare at him with unapproved. Not only that, but banjo boy Billy Redden from "Deliverance" is even there making a cameo. Tiger or Tige for short goes up to his cabin of solitude and with his new 'blastfighter' of a weapon goes on a little hunt. Three other assholes cross his path and shoot a deer but won't put it out of its misery. Tiger saves its fawn and takes it up to his house to take care of it. He drives the animal into town to purchase a baby bottle. When he comes back to his car the locals have cut the deer's throat. This means war and he easily kicks redneck ass. This puts him back in the local jail but he's bailed out by an old friend, Tom.(Eastman) The two men who once were best buddies had a falling out and Tom lays down the law for Tige. The reason the hunters never actually killed the deer while hunting is that an Asian poacher uses the half dead animals to make medicines. He pays good money to these yokels and Tom is in on the cut aside from running a lucrative saw mill. One of those three hunters from earlier is Tom's little brother Wally, and he makes it his official duty to make Tiger's life miserable, even going as far to sabotage his brakes. For his actions Tiger strikes back, pushing Wally's hunting truck down a hill. This pisses off Wally and his barefooted overall wearing friends even more. (Hell, they deserved it!)

Dueling Groceries

Who killed Bambi?

Buck Lo Mein

A strange pretty lady shows up at Tiger's place and for some reason won't identify herself. We find out later that she is Tiger's daughter Connie and she wants to be part of his life. Connie is played by Valentin Forte who also hooked up with Ruggero Deodato (in more ways than one) for the films Cut and Run and Body Count. Tige tries to push Connie away feeling sorry for himself, exclaiming that he's not a good father and a failure at life. He gets some more support when his cop buddy from earlier shows up, the one who gave him the gun or blastfighter if you will, and a friend of Connie's who's a park ranger in training. Pete the ranger is played by none other than Michele "The Church" Soavi. Tiger now comes to his senses and decides it's time to leave and start fresh with his family and friends, but is it too late? Tom's prick brother rolls barrels of fire down the mountain setting their transportation on fire. All the rednecks from town have come together to kill Tiger and his friends and they do kill Tige's cop buddy and Pete the wannabe ranger. They almost even rape Connie. Tiger's had enough and with his massive weapon he goes on a hunt of his own, the hunt for an entire town of redneck pricks!

"I like turtles"

It's the Blue Collar Comedy Tour

This movie works very well as a revenge film. Bava pulls all the strings to make the viewer pissed and keeps you rooting for Tiger all the way. The dialogue is pretty dopey throughout but I did find a few tender moments and some real chemistry between Tiger and Connie as the father and daughter.
You won't want to miss the finale when Jake "Tiger" Sharp goes head to head with fifty plus rednecks and has a final showdown with George "Big Ape" Eastman!

A little First Blood, a little Deliverance, with maybe a touch of Bambi, this all-star cast is directed to perfection by Lamberto Bava.


Follow Theater of Guts @FilmGuts
Follow Skunkape @TrailersPU

Not Convinced you should seek out Blastfighter?


No comments:

Post a Comment

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...