Wednesday, June 1, 2016

Island Of Death

Island Of Death (Island of Perversion, Cruel Destination,Killing Daylight, Devil's Island) Directed By Nico Mastorakis, starring Bob Belling (1975).

In an effort to see everything on the video nasty list at least once I checked this one out, Nightmares In A Damaged Brain I saw twice, it was that good! Island goes out of its merry way to be ludicrous and repulsive or just shockingly ugly. I watched it at least 7 years ago when it floated to the top of the ocean of free range trash amidst shitty home videos, megalomaniacal YouTube celebs and people watching others playing video games. Or the shitty future we all have become accustomed to.

All I remembered about this Greek movie was that a horny dude gets morning wood and fucks a real goat! Thanks to Fandor, art house snobs and Grindhouse aficionados alike can enjoy this beautifully restored demented film for weirdos only. The director apparently was so enamored by the success of Texas Chainsaw Massacre that he figured why not capitalize on revulsion and make the most offensive Greek film of all time. One scene has a woman drinking pee and as far as I can remember there never was a segment where Leatherface pulled out his wiener and gave someone the ole R. Kelley treatment! 

nuthin to see here just stuffin some mutton

A perverted couple of freakos who are vaguely religious, start off the smorgasbord of nastiness slow by having intercourse in a phone booth while the dude calls up his mom. Pretty soon we're diving face first into rough terrain like the aforementioned bestiality (which thankfully is simulated) and death by drinking paint (or possibly quicklime). Two gay men are hunted like animals and slashed to death as Chris and Celia live out their vile fantasies in Athens.

Brains are blown out (they exit from the wrong side) and homophobic killings are sloppily covered up, but the police are conscious of their whereabouts and it won't be long till they are hopefully caught.This movie has the vibe of a dull late night soft core movie only it's ultra violence that replaces the kinky antics. I'd put this in that small category of Greek gross outs like Singapore Sling and the Anthropophagus series as more reasons not to visit that land that gave us the delicious falafel.

Dude quit hogging all the tahini sauce would ya?

Chris sort of resembles Rich Hall the SNL "sniglet guy" or a 70's porn version of John McEnroe. 
There's a horrid fake Donovan song, what's going on--was Demis Roussos not available? They play this jaunty tune as the Afro-ed black cop lands on the island to arrest these assholes. 

The way they hang the black dude is just as fucked up as you'd come to expect. I could see them remaking this with Ryan Reynolds, who after playing DeadPool is the go to slapstick psychotic maniac, maybe him and Elizabeth Banks would appear, since she's in every other movie on the planet. 

I feel as if the director was aware of the video nasty list and went out of his way to get on it, because this one seems to have a debauchery checklist. 

Next Chris and his wife try a threesome with a skanky mature blonde, he actually pees in her face and she at first goes what the hell? Than starts to like it, which really skeeved me the fuck out! The shot set ups are a lot like Clockwork Orange, which seems like a major influence here. As he kicks the poor woman, the camera wild spins around and around. Jessica Dubin who plays the old punching bag had an interesting career, she was in a few Troma movies, Fellini's Satyricon and even Pete and Pete on Nickelodeon.

Does it get anymore refreshing than this?

This island is crawling with pervs, maybe this whole movie is a PSA, warning you against traveling to Greece! Two rapist hippies try to fuck Celia in the bathtub and both get massacred, one gets his face shoved in a dirty toilet---there are many gag inducing moments in this flick! As vile as this film is, on some level it's hilarious, it's so absurd that it's nihilist comedy.


A scag shooting lesbian who puts on aerosol deodorant spray before seducing Celia is their next unfortunate victim. This movie is insanely misogynistic and hates women, even though it's funny at times, it's also genuinely unpleasant. One naked girl with the hugest muff I've ever seen gets violated by Chris in the shower and then sickled in the chest. IOD has a lot in common with The Sweet Movie only there's no pooping or psychical vomiting thankfully, it's almost hypocritical that it's not considered art, whereas the polish film is. Tomato, tomato whatever Criterion you know everything.

I'm not only gonna piss on hospitality I might even fart on it!

It all ends with both of them getting raped by a shepherd and Chris dying of exposure in a pit of quicklime that burns him to death when the rain hits it. I can't recommend this film but almost want to tell squares about it so they will unsuspectfully walk face first into a wall of depravity. My jaw dropped a few times, I'll admit it, but for regular GUTS readers I'm just preaching to the choir.



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