Showing posts with label videostores. Show all posts
Showing posts with label videostores. Show all posts

Thursday, July 10, 2014

Succubare




SUCCUBARE Directed By Wai Yip Starring Carter Wong (1981)

by Steve Fenton

US video ad-line: “A Blockbuster of Bone-Chilling Horror!”
A decidedly grotty Thai/Chinese coproduction from 1980, this is yet another in the spate of films ripping-off the Shaw Bros.’ over-the-top BLACK MAGIC duo. Four beautiful princesses of the “Mao” [sic?] tribe rule a superstitious mountain village near the Northwest Chinese border. Using extract from venomous snakes, these high-maintenance princesses (drama queens, more like!) possess the power to cast magical spells on any male foolish enough to spurn them romantically. Plentiful puff adders, cobras and centipedes slither and scuttle ominously about throughout. The “Ick!” Factor is decidedly high: A man who raises the witch-bitches’ spiteful ire develops a bloated, “pregnant” belly, and when his pasty white stomach is slit open a writhing mass of centipedes and redworms splork out. A Shaolin monk coughs up blood, while another lucky fella vomits assorted species of Annelida (them’s worms). Zombie-like afflicted spell victims become covered with scabs and cankers and writhe in agony…and so would you. A forlorn cow is axed to death and skinned in queasy detail, and a dog is roasted on a spit at a celebratory barbecue. Mmmm-mmm…pass the HP sauce!


Kobayashi I challenge you to a Salamander eating contest!


   The American distributor of this sordid affair laughably tried to pass it off as a “real,” mondo-style documentary along the lines of SHOCKING ASIA, even going so far as a bullshit explanation for the lousy dubbing (“For your better understanding, the producers of this picture have endeavored to replace the native language with English wording”!). Obviously non-authentic, SUCCUBARE does however contain more than its fair share of yucky mondo madness amid much unintentional humor and spastic kung fu. Within the first three seconds, a guy geeks a live, squirming serpent. Later, he chomps on a fat, squishy toad. Later still he bites the head off a white mouse. This mungy-toothed “character” serves absolutely no purpose other than to provide intermittent gross-out value, his scenes interspersed at regular intervals throughout the narrative (such as it is). Thus, only cheap thrill-seeking geekfreaks need apply. Just don’t plan on eating beforehand, during or immediately afterward. You have been warned!


Mao herpes/ Campbell kids disease aint pretty!


   Back in the ’80s, SUCCUBARE used to be available on VHS tape in N. America from the VCR company, duped in crummy LP mode, as I recall. Although copies of this flick are exceedingly hard to come by these days, there is a fully widescreen trailer for it on Volume 3 of the GRINDHOUSE TRAILER CLASSICS series, so by all means grab a copy and check it out.



Tuesday, June 24, 2014

Shameless Promotion: Lost Weekend Video




LOST WEEKEND, a legendary San Francisco Videostore is in danger of closing and needs your help.
   If you live in California or near the Bay Area, you should support them! Fuck Netflix and streaming (for now), get back in a time machine and help out one of the last video stores because as we all know they are a dying breed!  
   We here at TOG are guilty of being shills for Amazon (it's almost impossible to avoid) but almost half of this site has reviewed many impossible to find rare Asian films that I would've never heard of if it weren't for guys that paved the way for the lazy, spoon fed, internet zombie generation that we've all rapidly evolved into!
   Here are some films that I was exposed to byway of this store, when there were zero formats available, I'm talkin exclusively on VHS ONLY!



Ladies and Gentlemen The Fabulous Stains: The only copy you could find before the ridiculous Lou Adler kept it in his vault and threatened to never unleash it.




Massacre at Central High: This title is still very rare and was the first time I'd ever heard of the concept of nerds turning psychotic and killing their own kind.




Bad Ronald: No Warner Archives existed yet, no one would touch this with a greasy rake back then, only LWV.


   OK I didn't frequent the store that much but I do live in Oakland and it's a bitch to return them (I had to take a train and everything)! Those were the ones that made a huge impact on me. But I still went out of my way because you couldn't find them in uber cool California where people take everything awesome for granted. TOG is a place for cavemen and luddites to scream at the state on how the internet is destroying Video stores and Bookshops.

   Lost Weekend sells T-shirts as well (I just saw a cool George Romero/Ramones parody logo) and a rare Klaus Kinski fighting Herzog shirt. So please help these guys out if you can, LWV has been around since 1997 and on WEDS everything is 2 bucks, go out and support them.
This concludes our shameless Telethon preachiness and I wouldn't bother if I didn't believe in brick and mortar videostores and hate how Netflix has monopolized everything. 

STOP THE FUTURE ROBOTS

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